Jenny slammed on the brake to avoid hitting the car in front of her–spilling two Cokes and a bag of fries. “There goes the kids’ supper,” she yelled to the air around her. It was hard enough to transport 3 kids from school to three different soccer fields–much less
As children head back to school, parents worry. They worry about how to pay for books, clothes, and technology. They worry about who will influence their children. They worry about how to balance their own work, children’s activities, and family life.
Divorced couples face all this—plus. They worry
“I don’t want to go!!!”
What’s a parent to do when they hear this? For tips on how to get to the bottom of a child’s resistance to parenting time (with you or their other parent), see What if My Child Fights Parenting Time.
If you are the parent hearing this, the
“Please don’t make me go!!!”
What is a parent supposed to do when their child begs not to visit their other parent? Nothing proves as devastating or complicated in divorce.
When a child resists being with a parent, several challenges arise:
- Both parents begin to wonder what the other parent is doing,
- Both parents get confused about how to respond to their child, and
- Both parents risk legal consequences for not addressing the challenge rightly.
Obviously, parents facing this challenge need a strategy.
“Dad!!!! “ Tommy yelled from across the house, “Mom forgot to wash my band shirt. I have to have it for school today!” Simple statements like this set off nuclear warfare between divorced households and, far too often, expensive court battles.
It’s hard enough to blend parenting styles
Here’s to the Dads!!
Father’s Day celebrates the critical role dads play. Children with actively-involved fathers are:
- less likely to be aggressive when angered
- less likely to engage in alcohol or drug usage
- less likely to engage in risky sexual behavior
- more likely to finish high school
- more likely to go to college
- more likely to succeed in their jobs
- more likely to engage well with peers
In short–active fathers lead to happier, more secure, more successful adults.
Staying active can be hard after divorce. Between school, sports and other activities–parents
When Rob and Janet decided to divorce, he generously moved to an apartment. The physical separation reduced tensions and allowed both to begin transitioning to life apart.
And yet—new problems arose.
In mediation, Rob repeatedly dropped references to
- “stopping by the house to check on the kids,” or
- “taking care of the yard on Saturday when I do my laundry,” or
- “coming to help with Amy with math while Janet is at work.”
Rob treated the apartment as his and the marital
As Joanne dropped into bed, the events of the day swirled through her head. Joanne relived the nightmare of the emergency run back to the school to grab a forgotten backpack. Amidst the soccer and gymnastics practices–she barely made it before the custodian locked the doors. Just as she
A punch to the gut. A really painful punch. Tim literally doubled-over when his wife announced her decision to divorce.
Tim then spent the next week trying to get his bearings. “What did I do wrong? How can this be happening? Why won’t she listen?”
Grasping for answers, one morning Tim set
What do divorce and cooking have in common? It turns out–more than one might think.
I was preparing a meal for an ill friend’s family and had it timed to the minute. I could finish the cooking, drop my children at practice, and make an evening appointment. All with five minutes to